Let me start off by saying, I’m sorry if my best friend is actually reading this, and I say this with every intention of you reading this, but mate you’re competing against me. Much love….
Before getting into the messy deep analytical response, the biggest reason why I believe I’m my own best friend is generally due to my insane mind. Of course, we all have dangerous minds that would most definitely end us, but in all honesty, my mind is probably the craziest [insert: crazy laugh]. I should probably clarify I’m a part of the norm society so don’t be scared reading this (you’re safe). I mean clearly, have you read my previous posts? (If not, do it now, right now, this second, go go go, now, thanks)
Firstly, I believe (wait, know) I’m the funniest person in a present room. I have this undermining habit of making everyone in sight of me, that I’ve of course taken notice of, a character. This character could be as far fetched as a superhero or as mysterious as a new romance love. I partially took notice of this habit when I started day dreaming how it’d be like to date one of my lecture teachers. For almost 10 minutes, every time he’d taken sight of another student I would think to myself, how dare he? I could get him fired, even worse sent to jail! Wait… no, it might actually be legal. Nevertheless, despite me seeming like I was deeply concentrated to what he was preaching about, I hadn’t really heard anything. At this very moment, I understood that I was not exactly normal and fully accepted my sanity.
I have this ‘fascination’ character at [insert location], don’t trust the world to mention the location. I made sure I hadn’t stalked this person on social media, just so the character image wasn’t tainted by real life. The key is to separate the two worlds completely. Think about it, if you knew your character (in real life) had a girlfriend, their ghosts would be leaning over their shoulder-hating on you every time you laid sight of them. How do I know this you might say. I have tried making up a relationship amongst me and a fellow friend, knowing he had a girlfriend and let’s just say, it somehow quickly became a love triangle between the 3 of us, not pretty! The thing is, I could never actually speak to the person with a clear mind afterwards. It’s like: you are yet to know the issues of our relationship boy, we’re on a break in my world.
Let me quickly say something deep (I’m sorry, I’m sorry). But whenever things take a turn, I had atomic betty (my superhero alter ego) to thank for picking me up. I would literally sit there nodding to myself when I was a bigger person. There’s always a battle in my head amongst my western proud self and my religious righteousness self. But no, atomic betty, she knew what was right for me, she knew how to help myself, she was my best friend. She was my strong self who (put your index finger in the air please) did not need anyone but her boss self to live happily ever after.
I’m not one to complain about being single (I promise you I’m cringing) but last weekend was just one of those days where you can’t help yourself. Clearly, atomic betty was resting after a long day of work and dealing with her not-so-friendly boss. But wow, I had crossed paths with 5 of my friends and their happy partners. It was kind of a build up of emotion every time I crossed paths with another couple. The first couple was like meh, second; was a little mhmm, third; I was like mannnn. But it wasn’t until I hit the 4th couple (within 6 hours I should say) I started questioning myself, like where the heck is Rob Starke at, tell me now, please? No, but wait, there was more! I was faced with a 5th couple after my little search for atomic betty failed. It only took a couple minutes before my ego best friend came back to save me, and I instantly cringed at myself for having the slightest downfall thought about being s****. No way I’m saying that word again. I was so reliable on myself, my downfall didn’t last a chance! I mean Bella (everyone knows who Bella is right?), could have been crazy for all we know, but she was definitely weird and somehow got Edward.
The funniest thing is, you will always need yourself more then you need another. No matter how bumpy the road ahead or beneath you is, you can never be alone if you love and depend on yourself. With me personally, I think I’m hilarious and frankly a genius. When people say something out of my norm, one of my alter egos will honestly be chattering to another alter ego and I’ll be laughing to myself. Like seeing those memes about living somewhere without technology and people for a certain amount of time for money. I go through the comments about how insane you would be afterwards but I truly believe me and my alter egos could handle it. We’re a funny bunch and quite creative. Can you imagine how much non-fiction books we would write? Come to think of it, the separation would most likely be an investment for my writing career.
Moral of this post, next time you bit your lip or have strong eye contact with me, remember this: you are a made up character who is either dating me or an animal who barks [insert: smiley face]. Goodnight.